My colleague, Emily Cosgrove, recently blogged about the value and impact of employee surveys – if you listen and you act on what you hear.
A former colleague of mine, measurement guru Joe Folkman, liked to say, “Only ask about things you’re willing and able to change, otherwise you’ll just piss people off.” That’s all true. Yet, there’s still a huge disconnect in many organizations between leadership and their teams – teams they say they value over every other asset … a sentiment I believe is sincere.
Why or how is that gap possible? And what might we use as a construct of understanding from one’s broader life to help bridge that gap?
Perhaps inspired by Father’s Day and/or because this post was written on the day of my daughter’s 21st birthday, I think the point of reference that may resonate with many of us is how we learn to listen more (and better) to our children as they grow. If we don’t, we lose so much – including the opportunity to truly know them as their own person and to remain connected in a way that allows us to have influence. We can ask questions about things that matter to them, listen to what they say, and – as appropriate – collaborate with them to shape their thinking and action in a manner that reaps the greatest return. That’s a win for them and thus for you.
It’s all true, and it’s all well and good … but it’s freakin’ hard. Part of the reason for the challenge is that we begin our role as parents in telling and doing mode. We get used to it. Change of any sort is hard for most of us. Changing what works, what feels most efficient is harder still.
The parallel with management and leadership is that we likely grew up in what Frederic Laloux describes as Red organizations in his master work, Reinventing Organizations. The Red organizations are all about command and control where we don’t actively transition to a more facilitative relationship once we onboard people. Whatever the reason, we continue to tell and do well beyond the point that such an approach makes sense for any of us or for the organization. In our families, kids rebel in ways that force the issue. In the work setting, rebellion too often takes the form of a loss of engagement and then departure. We may never recognize the issue, or feel as though we have the chance to address it.
So let’s be clear:
• High performing organizations listen to their people, but more importantly – they actively seek their input
• High performing organizations don’t fear being challenged by their people, they inspire constructive “dissent” to be better
• High performing organizations don’t wait to be asked for more opportunity by their people, they collaborate constantly about what’s of interest to their people and how to align those interests with the needs of the organization
• High performing organizations are dependent on engaged (and engaging) managers to grow their people through connection, development, and support
As parents, our greatest joy is seeing our kids succeed in ways that matter to them. As organizational stewards, we should take the same pride in the growth, success, and even movement of our colleagues. Let’s not only learn the lesson, let’s apply. Otherwise, you’re just going to piss me off!
